One of Innovative Editing’s three focuses is on businesses that don’t have time to do their own writing. As such, I spend about an hour twice a week looking through LinkedIn job postings to check out blogging, writing and editing openings.
That’s how I came across Crisp Video Group, a place I never want to do business with based on its hiring description:
If you’re feelin’ Crispy, be a part of one of the fastest growing video marketing companies in the country – as featured in Forbes, The Wall Street Journal, TechCrunch, Yahoo, and The Huffington Post!
We’re a fast-growing (and ridiculously hard-working) Hotlanta-based company, recognized in 2016 and 2017 for our bad-assness as one of the Atlanta’s Top 100 Fastest Growing Companies, Inc 5000 Fastest Growing Companies, and Atlanta’s Best Places to Work. We focus on providing the absolute best digital marketing and video production services on the market today. Our clients accept nothing less, and we wouldn’t give it to them anyway.
If you’re looking for something boring and easy, toss on a tie and go corporate because you’re not for us. Caffeine-addled nights and weekends happen. Embrace it. Nobody ever did anything epic in a safe little cubicle anyway.
Our team pulls together and gets the job done. No questions asked. At Crisp, the camaraderie flows like the waters of the Mississippi, only cleaner. We take what we do and how we do it very seriously. We work hard and play even harder. We go big or we go big (we never go home).
Again, if you’re looking for simple and easy, there’s a nice little cubicle down the street for you. We won’t judge. But if you’re looking to push yourself, think on your feet, and become an expert in 673 things you’ve never done before – perfect – step on in.
We’re not crazy; we just believe in what we do.
If this sounds like you, too, then it’s time to take things to the next level.
That’s quite the job posting! Hiring managers, take notice.
Typos and editorial issues aside, Crisp does a great job of immediately narrowing down the playing field and reducing the time it needs to review candidate applications. It certainly turned me off from contacting them, and here are the reasons why:
“If you’re looking for something boring and easy, toss on a tie and go corporate because you’re not for us. Caffeine-addled nights and weekends happen. Embrace it. Nobody ever did anything epic in a safe little cubicle anyway.”
No. 1, that whole thing is really snotty sounding. And as a short girl who’s literally been talked down to her whole life, condescending certainty is my biggest pet peeve.
No. 2, “Caffeine-addled nights and weekends happen.” Hey, I’m a business entrepreneur. I can’t tell you how many days I’ve gotten up at 5 a.m. and still been working at 10:30 p.m. But that’s my decision – and it’s one with the goal of not having to work 5 a.m. to 10:30 p.m. in the future. Only 5 a.m. to 5 p.m. In my opinion, a business that expects employees to work that much without paying them big-time bucks isn’t a business worth working for at all. And no, I’m not wowed by its “Atlanta’s Best Places to Work” mention. I used to work for one of "Baltimore's Best Places to Work." It was a Kool-Aid drinking cult.
“Our team pulls together and gets the job done. No questions asked.”
The first part sounds lovely.
The second part sounds like a dictatorship.
“We go big or we go big (we never go home).” – Sometimes small isn’t such a bad thing. Sometimes small is actually a necessary requirement of successfully going big. That’s not just me talking from a short-girl perspective here. This is Business 101.
“Again, if you’re looking for simple and easy, there’s a nice little cubicle down the street for you. We won’t judge.” – Really? ‘Cause you sound like you’re judging to me. And I don’t even work in a cubicle.
Clearly then, I’m not what Crisp Video Group is looking for in a writing, editing or blogging applicant. I think it sounds like a stressful, ultimately unfulfilling place to work.
Even so, I have to give it kudos for writing an exceptionally time-effective job posting. Nobody but its ideal business candidates are going to apply to that hiring call.